Vancouver, August 2006 |
Victoria (AU) 2006 (and above) |
At present, we're caught between two worlds, in more ways than the obvious. Clearly there's the move at play and oh, how I'm tired of it all. And then there's the ever-present pull to the north - the FAR north (read: Canada) which is difficult to describe and even more difficult to comprehend, perhaps unless you are a dual-country family (need a better term for it!) living with feet in both worlds, longing to be in both places at once and grappling with the reality of choices that find you solely in one and, for now, unable to return to the other.
This is where change brings me, to the looking back, the lamenting, the considering, the wondering, the contemplating, the remembering - so much remembering. Thinking about how we ended up where we are, not only in the geographic sense, and reminising on our journey. How we've moved through the times, the countries, the changes, the personal developments and why we are here now. Here I am in this philosophical state of mind and I'm not even pre-menstrual! Ha!
So today, my mind and heart are very much in the north and the past in general as I look to comprehend our lives that were and how we got here. And also thinking about this remarkable family, wondering where they find the courage and remembering our own long journey to parenthood.
Summer 2006/07 - with Elsa finally 'on-board', Manyana Beach, NSW (AU) |
And a reminder, of the breath. This afternoon, I need to take some very deliberate breaths and carry on, put aside my lamenting, considering, contemplating, remembering and live in the now. Such a cliche that last bit but, for me, today, nothing could ring more true.
Beautifully said and not easy to do.
ReplyDeleteAll our love...Jenn, Lance and Thomas